Is this worth it?

Whether you love me or hate me, you’re thinking about me. I prefer it if you love me, but I’ll take haters, too. It just means I’m doing something right and getting noticed. In life, you’re going to encounter people who like you, love you, & hate you. Sometimes, it can be any of those for no apparent reason or a variety of reasons. Stand up comedy is no different. There are many cliques and most comedians are insecure and see a lot of others as threats. Primitive in their thinking, but what can ya do? Other comedians will not like you or just plain hate you for whatever reason they think is necessary. I’m not quite sure as to why this happens but here are some possibilities listed below.

  • Jealousy – Maybe they’re jealous of your talent, your support, marketing skills, your looks, or all of those. Maybe they feel inferior than you. Maybe you’re in a place in your career that they want to be in. These are no excuses, however. All comedians are on a journey, we’re just all taking different routes. Why be jealous of someone, especially if they’re at a more successful place than you at the moment? Meet them. Talk to them. Network. Seeing someone else as an enemy only makes you look stupid. If you support each other, you’ll grow much faster as a performer.
  • Ignorance – Maybe they’re just ignorant and they make assumptions about you before finding out the truth. This could be willful ignorance. Maybe they’re scared to find out that you’re in a better place in life than they are at the moment. Again, keep in mind that this isn’t a permanent situation. Maybe you should stop assuming, swallow your pride (you know like swallowing, anyway) and approach that particular person directly.
  • Sexual frustration – Several comedians don’t have enough sex. This makes them aggressive towards others; especially if the other comedian gets laid more often than the frustrated one. This can tie in with jealousy and ignorance. One possibility is that deep down (that may have slightly aroused the frustrated comedian), the sexually frustrated comedian may be a bit nervous because they find the other comedian slightly attractive; but they’re homophobic and they don’t want to admit to the fact that they find someone of the same sex, cute. ESPECIALLY ANOTHER COMEDIAN.
  • Shitty parents – Most comedians have had some kind of tragedy in their lives, including being raised by assholes. That’s why we’re comedians in the first place. Our families weren’t stable a lot of the time and we need somewhere to go. Comedians are usually cynical to the world because of this. When a comedian bashes another comedian, it could be because they were “trained” to be an asshole for no reason, because they think it’s the normal thing to do. Maybe they’re trying to carry on the family tradition of being an asshole, especially towards another comedian who is clearly better than them. Being an asshole to someone else who shares similar goals and dreams as you only makes them better than you, the asshole, automatically. So, stop being an asshole.  Remember, unlike your homosexual tendencies, you can choose to not be an asshole.
  • High on pedestal – So, that prick had a great show, got laughs, and feels great about it. They got paid their twenty-bucks and left the bar that night (alone or with a very drunk minor) and now, they’re walking around, feeling better than that other comedian, who is actually better than them as a person, not a comedian, and now they’re up on a pedestal. I admit, it feels GREAT making a room full of people laugh, no matter how big or small, no matter where it may occur, but I do my best to remember that I’m still far from where I want to be as a comedian. However, some other douche-bags feel like this is their ticket to walk around with their butt-shaped chin in the air, snubbing us inferior primates who could only dream of being as high up on as they are. Again, it’s great to feel high, but just be realistic.
  • All of the above – Maybe you’re in a bad mood because your mom caught you spanking it to your first stand-up video on Vimeo or maybe you’re a dickhead for every reason (and more?) that I’ve listed above. Maybe you’re a jealous, ignorant, asshole, who’s high on a pedestal. I’m sure you graduated from a diploma mill and the following may not be new to you; which means you probably forgot this great quote, “The unexamined life is not worth living.” – Socrates. Take your day job money and buy a mirror. Look at your aging face and say to yourself, “I’m done being a dickhead.”

The same goes for your comedy career. I don’t think of myself as superior to any other comedian. I know that we’re all on a journey with high hopes of at least making a few bucks here and there. Some have had more success than others. Most of us get on stage because there’s something about it that we love. Yes, I promote myself a lot online and on the streets, but it’s not because I think I’m great, it’s because I am a stand-up comedian. A product of myself. My own logo. I’m my own “Public Relations” and I admit that I’m not always great at it. If nobody knows who I am or what I do, how would anybody know what I do or who I am? DO YOU GET IT? Look, I don’t care if you hate me. Sure, it bothers me, some, as it would bother anyone, but it mostly bothers me that you were too stupid and ignorant to take the time and find out the truth for yourself. Instead of being an adult, you decided to get together with your clique of comedians, for reassurance that your existence still has some sort of relevancy in this seemingly dying world. However, the world isn’t dying, it’s just YOUR world that’s dying. You’re the one who built it out of shit. Now, you lay out in your fantasy shit world, on your mentally created shit beach, and make shit castles.

YOU HAVE THE POWER to stop being so worthless, however. You made yourself worthless by thinking that you’re better than another human being. You’re too scared to put yourself out there like those other comedians, whom you’re jealous of, because you’re afraid to openly fail. Maybe you’re afraid to fail because your daddy won’t hug failures. Guess what.. you have failed! Every time you think that you’re VIP in life & especially in the world of comedy, you’re a miserable failure. Grow up, but don’t grow up too much, that may take away from any chance of being comedian, which you still have. I believe in you. I know you can change. Just remember, if you dislike someone, the best thing that you can do is ignore them (contradicting myself here, I know.) If you don’t mind them, like them, or actually love them, don’t be afraid to show it. It may help you in the long run.

Finally, I need to give props to those who are actually very loving & supporting towards others, especially other comedians. I have met so many great comedians who are willing to go to everyone else’s shows, without asking for much in return. It’s not an easy career to take on, so it really helps when comedians team up. I’m not saying that everyone has to kiss each other’s asses or fake it, but there’s no real need to bash or talk negatively about anyone who is undeserving. The rest of us, who do support each other because we know it’s the right thing to do, plus we realize that support leads to more support and hate leads to more hate, will probably get a better taste of what being a stand up comedian is truly about. Making people laugh. Making people feel good, while making fun of the assholes.

– AH


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